C: Since you've been the best mom, I'm going to give you a dollar!
C: Why does Dad always have to go to work? Why didn't he get money in his stocking?
C: Amn't I the luckiest boy?
C: I'm bored watching too much TV. Jordan, watching too much TV makes your brain hurt.
(We haven't even made it through an entire movie yet)
Me: I'm dead, so I can't eat ice cream.
C: Well, I had a health weapon so now you can eat more good ice cream.
Jordan: Tip-toe!
C: No, we can walk on our regular feet!
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