The Nightly News

C: Can we go to the train store?
Me: We don't have time before school.
C:  But I don't like going to school most days.  I'm not going to go every day! 

Dad: You going to get up?
C: I'm trying, but it's really hard.

C: Will you still love me when you go out tonight?
Me: Of course I will! You never stop loving your kids.  Ever.
Break my heart!

C: I need to watch the weather!  Jeff Weather (Renner) is on, and that guy is Jim. 
(Jeff Renner & Jim Forman)

C: Did you know that people [in Nevada] also speak Nuevan?

C: This sauce was pretty licky!

C: This 'S' always has to be in the front or I have them on sideways or backwards.

C: Maybe you can just put him down so I can snuggle with you!

Super impressed with his worksheet!

News Boy

New bones from Grandma

C: What if every person was a person?
Me: Every person is a person.
C: What if everything is a person?
Me: That would be a lot of people.

C: I know another way to get to that coast place with the hurricane.
Me: Florida?
C: We could also use cheetah powers! 
Me: Do you know where cheetahs come from?
C: Where?
Me: Africa.
C: So we could take a plane to Africa, and ride the cheetahs across Africa, and if there is an ocean? (I nod) Then we take a ferry across and then will we be at Florida?

C: Do we get to choose what we have for dessert?
Me: Not tonight.
C: Why?
Me: Because it's almost bedtime and you just finished eating five minutes ago.
C: But I am going to be starving during the night if I don't get to have dessert!

C: When winter comes, the snow will fall and freeze all the fires, and then when they unfreeze, the water will come and put out the fires. 

C: Did you know that the fires have also been firing the road?

C: And on the fourth week in Seattle the weather is going to be pretty not good.

Today's fashion statement

Colton on This & That

C: ... and here's its shooters!
Me: I don't like shooters.
C: But it's just pretend.  They aren't real.
Me: Yes, they are and that's why I don't like them.
C: But Mom.  If you don't like spiders, you can get a shovel and take down their web.
Me: Mmkay.

C: I'm glad that house is for sale!  Then we can take all-ALL of our stuff and move it next door!
Me: I don't think we can downsize to a one-bedroom, bud.

C: It's okay if you a little bit-sometimes-accidentally call me banana.

C has folded all the blankets ~
Me: Do you want to fold the big green one?
C: No, because it's too big and I'd have to flap it.

C: It's King 5 news time! It's King 5 news time!  What channel is King 5 news? Hurry, Mom! What channel?

C: When I am king, I'm gonna declare that every day be donut day!

C: Grandma Lori? How come you planned so much time at the beach if you knew I was going to get so wet?

Model building with Mateo

There Is No Dinner

Me: There is no dinner because I ate it.  Burp. 
C: STOP!  YOU ARE BEING WRONG, AND I AM TELLING THE TRUTH!  DAD IS COOKING REAL DINNER!
Me: Nope.  There is no dinner because I ate it all.  Do you see any dinner?
C: No.
Me: Right.  Because I ate it.
C: Mom is being actually wrong!  Why do you like being actually wrong?

Dad: Are you going to watch the movie?
C: I can't.  I'm being too distracted by the babies!
He is his mother's son.

Me: So, did you get to play instruments or sing in music today?
C: We only get to play instruments when we are quiet and pay attention really well.
Me: That sounds like a good rule.
C: But I really a lot already know how to play that drum-thing.

Dad: Are you feeling better, buddy?
C: Yeah. But that sun is hurting my eye a little because it's warming my eye right there.

Dad: Is that boy in your class? 
C: Yeah.
Dad: Do you remember his name?
C: No.
Dad: Why don't you say bye?
C: I'm feeling a little too shy. 

Colton is double-fisting samples of a couple of donuts from Frost ~
Me: Which donut do you like best?
C: This one, because of all  the chocolate!
... he says of the bacon maple bar. 

C: I want that kind of car because it has a pretty pink steering wheel!

Dad: How are you feeling this morning?
C: All better! I'm just a little, tiny bit not feeling well.  Maybe like this much. (he pinches)

C: I gave Mom a hug, so she's happier. Was that nice of me?
We had a disagreement about leaving the gym tonight.

Sarah & Jordan beat us to the gym ~
C: That's really not even a little bit fair!

School Daze

Dad: You can have your screen time later with
me. (And this is how they played NHL13)

Me: Your Nanan will be there tonight and you get to go back to her house tomorrow.
C: But I can't!  I can't miss school!
Me: It's the weekend, bud.  There isn't any school.

C: Do I get any dollars?
Me: Thank you, Dad, for the change.
C: Thank you, Dad.  I am going to get my change up to $100!
Me: And what are you going to do with that money?
C: Then I can buy a paper printer.
Me: A paper printer?
C: Yeah, so I can print my own paper money.

C: I don't think I can go to school today, Mom.  I'm too hot.

Me: You have PE today!  It's gym time for kids.
C: I hope I get to play lots of video games! (He plays the computer while at the gym daycare)
Me: No, you get to get to go exercise like you always want to when Mom goes to the gym.
C: Oh! And I hope there will be mattresses!
Me: Mattresses? You mean like play mats? 
C: Yeah.

Me: Maybe we can watch some AFV or a movie tonight.
C: Maybe we can watch some AFV *before* the movie!
Me: One, not both.
C: If you don't want me to be too excited, then we can just watch the movie. If you want me to be too excited then we watch America's Funniest before the movie.  That is your choice. 

Rocket Man!

Me: Hurry-hurry-hurry!
C: Activate cheetah power!

C: You know what would be nice?
Me: What's that?
C: If Dad would come into my room and turn the piano way down and play me some music while I sleep.

Dad: I'm going to have to talk to your mom about having ice cream tonight since it's so late.
...
C: You know what we need to talk about, Mom?  Having ice cream!

First Day of School!

C: Can you tell Dad that...
Me: You can tell Dad; he's downstairs.
C: But that will wake him up.

C: Dad? Since it's a the first day of school and I didn't eat all my dinner last night, I'm going to eat five Dutch Babies.
For the record, he ate four.

C: Why can't you make the Dutch Babies?
Me: I don't know how.
C: Ask Dad to tell you. 

C: My dad makes the best Dutch Babies in the whole world! 

First day of kindergarten with Ms. Gerla - looks like 4 or 5 girls & ~15 boys
with 2 absent.  Will be a lot like Pre-K!

Me: Lorena cleaned your room and it looks BEAUTIFUL!
C: How long do I have to keep it clean?
Me: Forever.
C: Are you just kidding?
Me: No.  Do I look like I'm kidding?

Dad: What did you help your teacher with?  She said you were a good helper.
C: You know what we all helped with?
Me: What?
C: Cleaning up.  But the teacher didn't help. 

Kindergarten is hard.

My Knight in Shining Armor

At Pump It Up ~
C: I'm so excited I can hear the air!

Me: You didn’t wear your listening ears today.
C: They’re broken.
Me: We’re going to have to get you some new ones.
C: There aren’t any. Everyone just took them.
Me: We should get yours fixed then.
C: We’ll have to take them to the mechanic.
Me: Who’s the mechanic?
C: Dad.
Me: I’m sure he’d be happy to fix your ears.

C: Denton needs to noose. He’s sucking his thumb, so he should noose.

C: What if we were all kings? And all the girls would be queens and princesses. And you would be a princess.
Me: A princess? How come?
C: Because you didn’t get enough points.
Me: And how do you get points?
C: You didn’t get enough medals. You only have 6, and you need 6 million medals!
Guess I better get running…

C: And Dad is the king!
Me: How come he is a king and not a prince? He doesn’t have any medals.
C: Because kings don’t need anything to be kings. They just wear crowns on their heads.
Me: Are you a king?
C: No, I am a knight!

C: And princesses cook the food, that’s why you need to be the princess.

C: The babies are baby knights and as they get more medals, they get closer and closer to being a king.
Me: I thought you didn’t need any medals to be king?
C: When they grow, they get more and more medals. Make sense?
Me: Not really.
C: But it has to! Believe me!

C: And when I get married, I’m gonna be married 6 billion times! Because I don’t want to have no Christmas bells.

C: What would you like the knight in shining armor to do?
Me: Go play.

Our Hero

Our superhero is ready to take on the day.

C is in time-out ~
C: Is it okay if I rub my head on the stairs so I can give myself some more good behavior?

C escapes time-out ~
Me: GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW!
Siri: Do you want me to find restaurants near you right now?

C: Mom? I would like to have this covered in chocolate sauce.
Ew?  He's having a hard-boiled egg.

C: Why don't you put glass in the holes and make it more glassable? (eye holes for his mask)

Me: Do you remember what happened when you were running too fast in the bathroom?
C: This is different.  I'm not in the bathroom!

Colton on Saving

C went to the fridge to get just ONE grape, because I told him he could have them as a treat with lunch ~
C: I’ll have one now and the rest later.

Colton to random kid at the park ~
C: I never talk to strangers!

Me: Can you turn on the light for me?
C: Only if you pause reading!

C: This show is called America's Funniest Videos because it has America's funniest videos on it.
Thank you, Capt Obvious.

C: Why do you ALWAYS have to watch shows in English?

Me: I hope I don't hear about any fighting at practice today.
C: I won't even fight a little bit!
And he didn't.  Yay!

Me: Did you have fun at the park? 
C: I had a tiring time at the park.  We had to do all this running.
That was the point.

C: Why don't you buy them a new toy?
Me: Why don't YOU buy them a new toy?  You're the one that broke it.
C: I'm not going to spend any of my money until I'm in the NHL.

C: Next time I get screen time, I'm not going to go to PBSkids or Sprout.  I'm gonna make the weather!
Me: How do you do that?
C: It goes rain-sun-rain-sun. And on the other weather, the pattern will go sun-sun-thunderstorm.
Me: The other weather? What's that?
C: The other one is rain-sun-rain-sun.  Okay?